


Acidulous

by ThatBohoFemme



Series: Reunification [2]
Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Dean Talks About Feelings, Dean is In Over His Head, Dialogue Heavy, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Present Tense, Reconciliation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-18 06:22:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11868474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatBohoFemme/pseuds/ThatBohoFemme
Summary: Seth's worried about Dean not sleeping which leads to a very heavy conversation about their past and where they're going.





	1. Things that Need to Be Said

**Author's Note:**

> Don't ask me where these keep coming from. Expect something fluffy coming remotely soon. I do love good angst though...
> 
> Enjoy!

"Do you ever sleep?" Seth asks, breaking the silence. Dean drops the fork into his salad plate, now ripped out of his thoughts.

"That's a weird question." Dean exhales sharply. "Why?" 

"Because you didn't come to bed until like 4 am." Seth closes his eyes. "Just worried about you." 

"Why's that?" Dean pulls the highball of whiskey to his lips, takes a long drink and then crunches a mouthful of ice. He knows that Seth finds ice crunching vulgar and annoying but right now, he doesn't care. 

"Dean, I just got you back- really don't want the chance of losing you again." Seth reaches across the bistro table and squeezes Dean's hand.

Dean pulls away, almost as if the gesture is _painful_. He's managed on his own for as long as he can possibly remember. Now of nowhere, he's got his ex back- a _great_ guy who actually worries about him. 

He honestly isn't sure what to make of this. 

"Not used to sharing a bed- I guess." Dean mumbles, looking away. He doesn't want to tell Seth that he also stays awake with the thoughts that plague him. "Also just can't sleep." 

"Look, I just don't want you to go down." Seth stares across the table. The fire in his eyes is quickly growing hotter and is starting to make Dean _extremely_ uncomfortable. He knows that if he breaks their eye contact, Seth will only consider it fuel for the fire and make the conversation that much worse. 

Dean picks up his fork again, stabs a tomato and pops it in his mouth. He chews a few moments longer than necessary in an effort to buy time.

"Seth, I love you more than you could possibly know." Dean closes his eyes. "You were my last _serious_ relationship." 

Dean's afraid that Seth will end up being a mirage- one second here but get enough and _poof, he's gone._ Losing Seth once almost killed him.

He just isn't sure if he can survive another heartbreak like that again. 

"You haven't dated anyone in _three years_?" Seth sounds incredulous. 

"Casual sex here and there. No real kissing. No sleepovers. Yes, I realize that sounds insane but we had a _really_ good thing. Then all the crazy shit happened." Dean exhales sharply again, leaning back in the metal chair. "Had to learn how to go from _us_ to me. Decided that that was a position I _never_ wanted to be in again." 

"So you basically said _if I can't have Seth, I don't want anyone else_?" 

"Not quite that extreme." Dean shakes his head. Time to lay it all out there. "You were my greatest story that I never actually wanted. I saw myself marrying you, having a family and growing old with you." He fights back the tears that are now burning hot behind his eyes. "Shit that I never saw for myself before you. Shit I didn't see for myself after you." 

"Dean, I wish I had the words- the right words- but I don't." Seth grimaces. "I was young. I was stupid. Thought I had _all_ the answers. Chance to grow in my dream job? Chance to be a legend?" He releases a sharp breath. "I wanted it all and I was _selfish_." He emphasizes the last word before closing his eyes and dropping his head into his hands. 

"I could have seen you leaving because I wasn't part of your happily ever after but you just left in the middle of the night." Dean picks up the highball and starts crunching ice again. "We fucked. I fell asleep. Woke up and you were _gone_. Just a note on your pillow." 

"I can't apologize enough." Seth looks absolutely miserable. Dean figures that it's because this is the first time Seth has had to own up to his actions. "Young and stupid- it's not an excuse but exactly what happened." 

"Think we can make it work again?" Dean finishes the ice in his glass and begins to look for another distraction- anything to take the edge off the energy he's buzzing with. Finding a paper napkin, he begins to shred it. 

"I'd like to think so. No one has ever come even remotely close to you." Seth signals the waiter, asking for the check. "I know you probably don't believe me but I love you." 

Dean nods, now shredding the napkin shreds into even smaller shreds.

"Love you too." Dean places the napkin pieces into a plate. "More than you can possibly ever know."


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seth has to confront his demons while dealing with a hospitalized Dean.

Seth is convinced that he doesn't deserve the man sleeping next to him. 

Dean's sound asleep. He's coming down with something- either a cold or a sinus infection. He's not sure which but knows that he's feeling like shit. Whatever it is has led to a snotty, cranky, clingy Dean. 

_I don't understand why he has so much trust in me._ Seth thinks, watching Dean sleep. His head is pressed to Seth's chest and his arm is wrapped around his waist. 

For as fucked up as Dean claims to be, Seth knows that he is a far more fucked up person. The last time they had been together, Seth had been a complete coward. He couldn't find the strength to just tell Dean that he was leaving. 

Instead, he chose to just leave in the night.

As Dean so eloquently said... _we fucked and you left while I was asleep._

Seth gently touches Dean's sweaty forehead. He seems hotter than he did before.   
Silently, Seth curses under his breath. Dean almost never gets sicker and when he does, it tends to run rampant in his system.

Hacking, Dean startles awake. His eyes grow glassier and glassier. A thin coat of sweat covers his skin, which has been drained of all color. 

Seth presses his lips to Dean's forehead. This confirms what he's already suspected.

"Holy shit. You're burning up." Seth squeezes his eyes shut. "We're going to the ER." 

Much to his surprise, Dean doesn't fight.

\-------

Seth does not consider himself a particularly paranoid person. He's never been one to jump to the worst case scenario. He's always been able to remain calm in crisis.

This isn't the case tonight. 

Seth can't stop pacing the waiting room. The nurses had insisted that he stay in the waiting room until they can figure out what's going on. It wasn't exactly what he wanted but he listened. 

_What the fuck am I going to do if he dies? I just got him back._ Seth thinks as he paces. _God, I fucking hate all this waiting._

"Mr. Rollins?" the nurse calls, entering the waiting room. "You can head in now." 

Seth hurries to keep up with the nurse. The hospital hallways twist and turn until they get to a curtained off room. She points one finger towards the room. 

Seth pulls the curtain back and is relieved to see Dean sitting up in bed. He's still pale but he looks more coherent which is a big relief to him. 

"Seth, I'm fine." Dean leans back. "Just managed to get dehydrated and catch whatever's going on around the locker room." He coughs, wincing. 

Seth squats next to the bed. Sighing, he runs a hand over Dean's IV-less hand. 

"You scared the shit out of me." He squeezes Dean's hand. "I thought I was going to lose you." 

"It takes more than a chest bug to take me down." Dean winces again. "My chest is on fire. I also can't get to sleep." He stares up at the ceiling.

"Let the drugs kick in." Seth finds a washcloth, wets it in a sink and drapes it on Dean's forehead after wringing it out. "Promise you'll feel better." 

"You'll stay?" Dean weakly squeezes Seth's hand. "I _really_ don't like hospitals." 

"Where am I going to go?" Seth rubs his eyes, trying to ignore the burning pain. "I promise I'll be here until we can get you back to normal." 

"Love you, Seth." Dean closes his eyes and drifts to sleep. 

Seth wishes he knew what it was about Dean's energy that just managed to draw him in. He tried to find someone else at one point but it just didn't work.

No one could live up to Dean Ambrose.

The doctor checks back in, claiming bad bronchitis with a faint touch of pneumonia. Dean's going to have to stay for a few days to work on clearing the infection but he will make a full recovery, barring anything extreme.

Seth feels like a weight has been lifted off him. 

"Dean, I'm going back to the hotel for a bit. I need to take care of some things and I'll be back." The last thing Seth wants to do is leave his significant something alone in a hospital but someone needs to make sure the little things are handled.

Life didn't stop just because Dean was sick. 

"Promise you'll come back?" Dean stares up pleadingly. The depth of the pain in that look stabs Seth in the heart.

"I would be nowhere else." Seth quickly pecks Dean on the cheek. 

Seth knew that he had hurt Dean a lot. Once upon a time, he had been a stupid idiot, trying to fix his life, just trying to settle for whatever the road had planned. 

He didn't know that that road needed to include a certain blue-eyed man. 

If only he knew then what he knew now...

There is something in the way Dean watches him leave that stabs at Seth. It's as if he expects that this is the last time he will see Seth again. 

That hollow piercing look shakes Seth more than he cares to admit. That's a look only given by a man that went to sleep blissfully in love and woke up to find out that the love of his life disappeared in the night, just leaving a note on the pillow. 

Seth had always known that one day he would have to atone for his sins. He just hadn't expected that day would come quite so soon.

He would find a way to make it right even if it took forever.

\----------

Seth returns to the hospital a short time later. They've finally moved Dean to a real room which is a welcome change from the crowded emergency room. 

"You came back." Dean sounds surprised. 

"Where the fuck would I go?" Seth rolls his eyes, setting a gym bag down. He reaches into a plastic grocery bag and pulls out a small stuffed penguin. 

"You didn't have to do that." Dean eagerly takes the penguin. 

"Maybe I just wanted to do something _nice_ for you." Seth winces, trying to get comfortable. The recliner is ridiculously stiff and clearly not made for someone his size. "This is going to be over before we know it. We will get you through this." 

"Just hate being sick." Dean leans back and falls asleep, the stuffed penguin clutched to his chest. 

Seth isn't sure how he manages to sleep. The chair isn't very comfortable and Seth is _worried_. 

He knows that people don't die from the common cold. This freak hospitalization is just that- a freak occurrence.

He wakes up to Dean talking to him. 

"You sleep like a log." 

Seth forces himself to a sitting position and finds Dean staring straight at him. Much to his relief, Dean's color is coming back and he looks coherent. 

"What makes you say that?" Seth stands and stretches, trying to shake off sleep. 

"People have been in and out all morning. You've budged like twice." 

"You scared the shit out of me." Seth admits. "Guess I was just able to relax once I knew you were okay." 

"Well, I feel like I'm back in the land of the living." Dean stifles a cough. "Oh and I knew you loved me." He sighs. "How bad was I?" 

"You don't remember?" For some reason, Seth is surprised by this.

"Must have been _really_ out of it. I remember chunks but not too much else." Dean shrugs. 

"You spiked a high fever and we ended up here." Seth gently shoves Dean over and squeezes in beside him. "You were dehydrated. Had the beginnings of pneumonia. Seriously thought I was going to lose you." 

"Takes more than a little dehydration and pneumonia to take me out." Dean leans into Seth. "Though the dehydration explains why I feel like shit." 

"Do I need to get you food?" Seth asks. 

"Think they're bringing something resembling breakfast. Still may send you out." 

"Can I just apologize again?" Seth gently kisses Dean's forehead. 

"You've apologized a million times already." Dean grips Seth's hand. "I forgive you and we're moving on." 

Seth would like to believe this but he knows that it's going to take a lot of time for him to forgive himself and press on. 

They'll have that conversation eventually but this isn't the right time and he knows this.


End file.
